A few new mothers told me that they would, at times, forget that they were pregnant. Since I was still suffering through the 1st trimester when I heard that, I politely smiled and nodded but was really thinking "you've got to be kidding me". Really, who could forget the discomfort...much less the extra bulk. But, alas, it's true. When I'm just around the house, reading or playing with Cali, I have had occasions where I totally forget what's going on inside me. Or how much life will be changing in just 4 more months. But then I feel Tobin starting up his gymnastics or I walk by a mirror and get an abrupt reminder. It's a good one though...4 months seems like a long, long time to wait to meet our boy. Remind me of that later, please, when I want to send him back where he came from!
J.Paul received a book, Point Man, from my dad the other weekend and suggested I read one of the chapters about raising a child. It made me think more on how we're called as parents to raise children, specifically about how we have to demonstrate the role of father/mother, husband/wife, and man/woman to the little people learning from us. It seems like a lot of people use Ephesians 5:21-33 in wedding ceremonies - we did - but then forget to reflect on the words after marriage becomes a routine. Thinking on how Tobin will learn about God and how people relate to each other and the world made me go back to these verses. Will Tobin see me submitting to J.Paul's leadership as the head of our household? Will he then see us submitting to the Lord's leadership in all aspects of our lives? I so easily get caught up in thinking about how strong I am, how competent in making my own decisions, how marketable my skills are to earn money for more than just necessities...but these are traps that cause me to forget about submission. Hard to submit when you're trying to power the engine! There's no way to address my problem of self-reliance other than training my eyes on God and asking Him to both humble me and show His own glory.
Something else that's been on my mind is how necessary it will be for us to show Tobin the importance of the church. J.Paul and I work with our church's youth group and we're making some pretty big changes in the fall to do more toward encouraging youth to attend "big church" with their families. Seeing how few students participate in corporate worship, really how few students even regularly attend church functions at all, brings home the point that our children won't make church a priority until parents show them the importance of meeting together with the body of Christ. It's easy now to point fingers at parents without thinking about my own heart on Sunday mornings or Wednesday evenings, even before we have to get a child up and ready to go. Tobin will be watching everything (and probably doing a fair amount of eavesdropping on mom and dad), so showing evidence of my desire to be with other Christians in worship and growth will be important as he learns to appreciate the church and make it an integral part of his own life.
This was a weighty post, but I guess that's what happens when I have too much time on my hands to think! Next week, I begin teaching my 5-week summer session and imagine there will be much less free time for pondering the mysteries of life. Instead, my head will be filled with accounting theories and how best to communicate them to my students in order for them to gain some sort of understanding! I know, I know...I'm nuts. ^_^
Love in Christ ~ Valerie
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